


the road ahead is as long as you make it

by I_mNotYourEnemy



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, Getting Together, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Road Trips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2019-08-19 13:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16535156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_mNotYourEnemy/pseuds/I_mNotYourEnemy
Summary: “Ooh, I can drive!” Jester exclaims.“Jes, I wouldn’t call what you do driving,” says Beau, much to the amusement of Molly and disdain of Jester.Or: Caleb is thrown into the mess that is Nott's friendship group, with all of their complexities, rough edges, and fierce loyalty. He's not sure he's going to survive this trip.--NOTE: This fic is unfinished as of chapter 4. Chapter 5 is a summary of what would have happened.





	1. Chapter 1

The thing about living with Nott, Caleb realises, is that he needs to learn to not question her.

He’s happy to have her around, happy to house her over her summer break from college, but he’s grown used to his own company, not including Frumpkin, of course. He still starts every time there’s an unexpected sound and still takes too long to remember why random items have been left strewn about. He’s long since given up asking where Nott gets most of her trinkets, knowing that most of them were likely stolen, but it doesn’t stop him staring at them in bemusement when they appear randomly on kitchen counters and windowsills. She says they’re gifts since he won’t allow her to pay him a penny towards rent; he remembers the struggle of being an overworked, underpaid college student all too well and wouldn’t wish additional stress upon her. Her job at the witching store in town pays modestly and he wants her to use the money on herself. She deserves the world.

It’s not long before he retracts that sentiment.

“Nott, I am working,” he says, not pulling his eyes from the text before him. He would be in the office still but they’re installing new wiring in the hallway and the drilling had been giving him an awful headache.

“Yes, well, you see. You could be  _not_ working.”

“Unfortunately, that is not the case.”

He doesn’t need to look over to know that Nott is giving him a pitiful look, complete with large eyes and an exaggerated pout. “But you’re never home.”

“I am home every night,” he counters.

“Yeah,  _night_. You come home, sleep, then go back to work! I never get to hang out with you.”

The protestation gives him reason to pause. He sets down his pen and offers his friend a weary smile. “You are on summer break, you should not be wanting to spend your time with an old man like me.”

“You’re not old, you just look it because you work too much. Which means you should stop working and hang out with  _me_  instead.”

Caleb shakes his head and gives a huffed, breathy laugh. “I went out with you and those friends of yours to that club the other day.”

Nott frowns for a moment, confusion visibly etched into her features before she realises what he’s talking about. “That was a month ago!”

“Yes, yes, the other day.” Nott grumbles something too low for him to hear in response. “I have to get this finished by tomorrow but how about we do something at the weekend, ja? We could go to that café or see if that antique store has opened up again.”

The offer seems to placate Nott for the time being, but she doesn’t stray far. She takes a seat at the small table that acts as both a desk and dining table depending on the occasion and pulls out her knitting from god-knows where. Caleb returns to his work when it seems she’s settled, sensing that perhaps their conversation is not as complete as she’d like. She doesn’t open another avenue of questioning, though, so he leaves it be, allowing the gentle sounds of clicking needles and pen scratching to sooth away the afternoon.

He's almost finished jotting down his latest findings on non-vocal spell casting when Nott says, “Caleb?” He hums in reply and she takes it as a sign to continue. “My friends and I were thinking of going on a trip somewhere, like a road trip. Y’know, as a last summer hurrah. If you want to come.”

The offer takes him by surprise. His scribbling freezes to a halt. “If I want to come?”

Nott nods eagerly. “Yeah! We don’t know where we’re going yet. We’re kind of making it up along the way. It’s just a couple of weeks messing around in the countryside, maybe a city, I don’t know.”

She babbles with great excitement and Caleb feels a growing pain in his chest at the idea of letting her down. “Nott… I cannot take the time off work. You go, though,” he adds swiftly, hoping to quell the disappointment in her eyes. “Have fun with your friends.”

“ _You’re_  my friend. You have enough vacation days left to—to take a whole month off!”

“The vacation days I get are purely for show.” He pauses as he spots Nott’s expression. “Oh, no, no, no, don’t do the puppy eyes.”

“ _Caleb_ ,” she whines. “At least come to movie night?”

“Movie night?”

“Yeah, on Friday. We’re having a bit of a get together. With, uh... Oh! You know Molly and Jester, you met them ‘the other day’. They'll be there.”

Caleb hopes his immediate thoughts are not present in his expression; his last meeting with Nott’s friends had been interesting to say the least. Molly manages the store Nott works at a few days a week and he has no idea how Jester fits into the situation. The blue Tiefling had squealed with delight when Nott had showed up at the club, leaving Caleb stranded with a complete stranger with wicked words and a wickeder tongue. Caleb may have accepted one too many drinks and been enticed by one too many flirtations. He doesn’t regret the night—he still has Mollymauk’s number in his phone and replies to his messages when he remembers—but it had been somewhat awkward to explain to Nott the following day why he’d left so early and how he'd acquired the various marks scattered along his neck.

“Pretty please?” Nott says.

Caleb gives in to her pleasing gaze. “Okay, I will go with you to movie night.”

Nott makes sure he stays true to his word, as he’s often known for agreeing to plans and backing out at the last minute. Was it not for Nott’s influence, he likely would never see a genuine social situation outside of his own shared office. Come Friday, Caleb finds himself stuffed into his best jeans and a clean shirt of Nott’s choosing, not that there were many options available, and is herded off to an unknown location.

“It’s Molly’s apartment,” Nott explains. “He shares it with Yasha. Y’know, the big one.”

Caleb does not know.

Panic rises like acid in his throat as Nott pulls them to a halt outside of the apartment door. He’s never done well around new people and the prospect of being thrown into the lion’s den isn’t one he’s overly comfortable with. He has to remind himself to breathe, to still the shaking of his hands, as the door swings open to reveal a vaguely familiar, blue face.

“Nott!” the woman squeals. His companion is lifted merrily, and with surprisingly little effort on Jester’s part, into the air. Once Nott is securely on the ground again, Caleb is faced with a piercing gaze. “Nott, who is smelly, ginger man?”

“That’s Caleb! You met him before, remember?”

“Ah!” Jester snaps her fingers and Caleb could get whiplash from how quickly she swings from frowning to grinning. “Of course! The man who slept with Molly.” The words slip so easily from her mouth, loud enough to fill the whole hallway and the rooms beyond, and Caleb can already feel crimson heat rising to his cheeks. “Hey, Molly!” Jester calls.

Before Caleb can prepare or offer any semblance of response, the aforementioned Tiefling swoops in to offer salvation from Jester’s antics. “Welcome, welcome, come in. Jester, Beau wants you.”

Jester grabs Nott by the hand and pulls her along as she skips gaily away. Caleb is left feeling like a ruin after a windstorm.

“Sorry about her, she’s not the most subtle of folks. Can I get you anything?” Molly’s words are smooth as ever as he grazes over the awkwardness that seems woven into the situation. Caleb shakes his head and allows himself to be led further into the apartment. The hallway opens up into a cosy living space with an overwhelming number of strangers chatting from various perches.

“Hey.” The nonchalant greeting comes from a girl draped across a battered couch, a picture of languid suave. She prods Jester sat beside her and ushers for her to move along, freeing up a space towards the left arm of the sofa. Caleb supposes he can’t turn down the gesture and takes the seat. Almost immediately, Nott is by his feet, sat on the carpeted floor and leaning back against his legs.

“Okay, this is Caleb. Caleb,” Nott says, turning to point at each stranger in turn, “This is Beau and Fjord. You know Molly and Jester. Where’s Yasha?” The latter question is directed at Molly.

As Molly answers, Caleb looks between his newest acquaintances. The woman seems enraptured by the discussion of their missing colleague. As he turns to look at Fjord, he jumps as he unexpectedly meets the man’s golden gaze. He looks away sharply, feigning interest in the conversation at large. Their problems seem to be solved rather swiftly as the front door swing open and clicks shut. Molly saunters off to greet the new arrival and Caleb wilts as Jester turns to him with a gleeful grin.

“ _So_ ,” she starts. “ _Cay_ -leb.” His name is drawn out and he’s never felt more terrified of something so familiar. “You slept with Molly, yes? He said you were very good. He had to buy me flowers because he said he would not leave so early and I was sad that you took him away so quickly.”

“Wait, wait,” Beau says, gaze rapidly alternating between Caleb and Jester. “Who did what now?”

“Molly did Caleb. I think. Maybe it was other way around, but I might be thinking of the other week with that elf from—”

“Oh, that one!”

Caleb can only look on helplessly as these strangers discuss the depressing dregs of his sex life. He’s only grateful that neither Fjord nor Nott join in. “And everyone knows about this  _because_?”

“I didn’t know,” Nott supplies helpfully.

“Didn’t know what?” Molly looks about the room, his amusement evident as he joins the room again with a woman Caleb assumes to be Yasha. Nott hadn’t been exaggerating when he described her as “the big one”. Caleb estimates she could snap his thin frame in half without breaking a sweat.

“Nothing at all. Yasha, you get what you needed?” Fjord replies, cutting off Jester. Caleb shoots him a grateful look and receives a casual smile in response.

“Just about,” Yasha says. She approaches with a large folded piece of paper in hand and black backpack slung over one shoulder. Beau jumps up from her position on the couch to help clear the coffee table for her to put her belongings down. As Yasha unfolds the paper, which appears to be a large map, Caleb realises that he has not heard any talk of movies since arriving. Sending Nott a dubious look, he realises he may have been swindled.

“Anyone got any places they want to write off before we start?” Yasha asks, pulling a pencil from her bag.

“Or anywhere in particular you wanna check out,” Fjord adds.

Jester leans over the table, face so close to the map her nose almost touches it. “I want to go to  _Hupperdook_.”

“If we’re agreeing on only two weeks then I’m not sure we’ll have enough time to drive up that far,” Molly says, deflating Jester’s initial excitement.

“That is no fun,” she pouts.

“Speaking of driving, I just got my truck checked over and she’s good to handle it. Just need another car for bodies but I reckon I could handle most’a the luggage and a couple other people,” Fjord says, an air of calm authority about him.

“Ooh, I can drive!” Jester exclaims.

“Jes, I wouldn’t call what you do  _driving_ ,” says Beau, much to the amusement of Nott and Molly and disdain of Jester.

“I don’t mind driving,” Molly offers, distracting from the light bickering bubbling between Jester and Beau.

Beau pauses in her squabble to say, “Oh, I have some camping gear.”

“So do I,” Yasha replies.

“And I have pastries!” Eyes turn towards Jester in confusion.

“Why do we need pastries?” Nott asks.

Jester gives her a look conveying just how idiotic she believes that question to be. “You cannot have a road trip without snacks, silly.”

“Oh. I suppose you’re right.”

“What about you, Caleb?” Fjord asks, once again steering the conversation towards a more productive path. “Anywhere you want to go to or avoid?”

Caleb, who’d been watching events unfold rather distantly, freezes as eyes turn towards him. “I… I think I will get myself a drink.” He stands abruptly, almost toppling over Nott at his feet. He rights himself awkwardly and shuffles off in the direction he hopes the kitchen to be in. There’s a brief mumble of conversation behind him as he leaves the room.

He already has a glass of tap water to his lips when Molly finds him.

“I take it Nott sprung this on you without warning.”

Caleb huffs a laugh into his drink. “That is a way to phrase it, yes.”

“She means well but you don’t have to come. I mean that in the nicest way possible, of course.”

With Mollymauk, Caleb decides, he can never read him. He’s not much of a people person but Molly’s smooth charisma and charm only further complicate any conversation with him. It’s hard to get a read on someone who is often many layers deep in white lies and flirtation.

“Of course.”

“If you need to, I can say you felt ill and you can run away right now,” he offers.

“No, no, it’s fine.”

The look he receives in return makes it perfectly clear that Molly doesn’t believe him. “I know we can be a bit intense so I won’t blame you for not wanting to shack up with us for a couple of weeks.”

Caleb doesn’t know how to reply so simply says nothing. He can hear Nott’s laughter from the kitchen, serving as a reminder for how easily persuaded he is when her happiness is at stake. This entire situation is almost laughably beyond his comfort zone and simply spells out a panic attack in waiting, but Nott had looked so happy surrounded by these people and their strange antics.

“I… Nott wants to go,” Caleb says. Molly nods and leaves silence between them for Caleb to continue in his own time. “I—I feel bad for not spending more time with her. She will be a sophomore soon and so busy if she keeps her job.”

“You want to spend time with her while you have it,” Molly summarises, plucking the words he’d been unable to say straight from his thoughts.

“Yes.”

“We’re a good crowd, basically family at this point. A bit complicated and rough around the edges but who isn’t these days? You could always join and there’s enough of us that it won’t matter if you want to steal Nott away to have some breathing room for a bit. You seem like you could use the break.”

For a moment, Caleb can only stare. “And when exactly did you become an expert on me?”

Molly barks a laugh and pats a heavy hand against his shoulder. “You’re not nearly as complicated as you think you are, Widogast.”

As he’s about to leave the kitchen, Caleb finds his path once again blocked by Jester. “Guys, this is not the time for foreplay. We plan road trip first and you have sex later. Except now Molly wants sex with Fjord, which is fair because Fjord is very handsome.”

“You have to say that, you’re dating him,” Molly replies dryly.

“But you can want sex from more than one person. I usually do. Did you get your drink, Caleb?” Caleb, left gaping and confused by the whirlwind exchange, only nods. “Great! We are looking up places to stay and I need more people who will want to see pretty museums. Come help me.”

Before he can protest, she takes him by the arm and marches him back to the lounge. When he looks back to Molly for help, the man only laughs at him.

“Caleb said he wants to see the pretty art museums!” Jester exclaims as Caleb takes his vacant seat. Nott shoots him a worried look and he placates her with a gentle stroke of her hair.

“Ain’t no one saying you can’t go, Jes,” Fjord says. “You just need to be prepared for people wantin’ to do different things.”

“You never said if you were actually coming or not,” Beau points out, directing her comment towards Caleb.

“Ah, I, er.” He clears his throat and tries not to shy away from the many stares. “I will see if I can get time off work. I cannot guarantee anything.”

He catches both Molly and Fjord smiling before he’s barrelled over by Nott. “Yes! I knew you would come, Caleb!”

Yasha clears her throat and turns back to the map, smoothing out crumpled edges from where Nott had caught it with her foot. It seems to signal everyone to get back to the task at hand as they debate the various pros and cons of different cities and town scattered across the map.

“If you don’t mind my askin’,” Fjord says as Jester tried desperately to convince Beau into going to Zadash, “where do you work?”

“I work for the University doing research,” Caleb replies.

Nott grins, her chest swelling with pride. “Caleb’s a  _doctor_.”

“A doctor!” Jester exclaims, momentarily distracted from her debate. “Do you sew up bodies? Have you ever seen a corpse?”

“Ah, no, n-not that kind of doctor,” Caleb stutters in reply. “She means just a PhD.”

Fjord snorts. “ _Just_  a PhD?”

Caleb mouths wordlessly as he struggles to draw together a reply. Before he can finish his floundering, Beau cries, “Fine! We’ll go to fucking  _Zadash_.”

Content with the argument's conclusion, Yasha sits back and sets her pencil down. Caleb cranes his neck to look at the map, eyes flicking between the few circled locations heading northwards. “That look okay to everyone?” Yasha asks.

Everyone nods their consent. Nott looks to Caleb with her wide, hopeful eyes. He holds her gaze for just a seconds before also nodding. “It looks perfect.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact this is half of the original chapter i had planned but it was already seven pages and i wanted to get it up this weekend
> 
> (also i was watching road to el dorado yesterday and tell me tulio isn't mollymauk from another life)

To Caleb’s utter surprise, he’s given the requested time off work with minimal backlash. When asked what he plans to do with the time, he explains the situation in the vaguest way possible yet still receives a few odd looks. He’s unsure of if he should be offended; he’s aware that he rarely speaks of personal matters at work but surely it can’t be  _that_  astounding that he has friends with which he wishes to spend time.

He’s kidding himself, of course. They’re Nott’s friends, not his. He’s the straggler they’ve adopted along the way.

He waits by the curb outside his apartment and stifles a yawn with one hand, his bag hoisted over one shoulder with Nott’s by his feet. The goblin in question is far too preoccupied with keeping a lookout for Molly’s car, bouncing on the spot and practically vibrating with excitement, to carry her own luggage.

“It’s this dark car, four doors,” she explains.

“Ja, and four wheels too?” Caleb mutters. A dark car with four doors; should be a breeze to spot.

“Maybe Fjord is with them. His car looks like it would beat you up and take your lunch money if it was a person.”

She says this with such utter sincerity that Caleb can’t help but laugh. As it turns out, her description is not far off. A large, open-bed truck pulls to a stop by the curb; Jester is already climbing out of the door before it’s come to a complete halt. Caleb eyes the car. He isn't aware anyone actually owns such a vehicle outside of movies. Fjord joins them as Jester assaults Nott with hugs and butterfly kisses. Before Caleb can object, he takes both of their bags and slings the straps over his shoulder as if they were filled with feathers.

“I’m gonna put these in the back—unless you need anything from them?”

“Ah, no. I’m good. I think Nott is fine too.” He looks over to Nott, brows raised, and she nods in agreement.

Only a second later, the fated dark car pulls up—complete with four doors and everything. Beau has the window rolled down and offers a lazy wave to the gathered group. Molly, too, raises a hand in greeting from behind the wheel, shades propped atop the bridge of his nose as he looks the sort of effortlessly put together that Caleb knows he could never achieve.

“Get in, losers,” Beau calls. Caleb finds himself dragged by the hand as Nott enthusiastically leads him over. Yasha has already claimed one of the seats in the back and offers Nott a soft smile as she shuffles into the middle seat. Caleb takes the final seat and closes the door behind him, a sense of finality sitting heavy in his heart. No turning back now.

 

* * *

 

 

The journey over takes the better part of four hours on the highway, only one of which Caleb is awake for. He’s never been much of an early riser; his habit of staying up working or reading into the early hours of dawn doesn’t exactly lend itself to being picked up by this motley crew just after sunrise. As Molly and Beau bicker over music choices and who, as the driver and navigator respectively, has the final say in the matter, Caleb leans his head against the window and watches the scenery zip by. He has no idea who won the argument in the end. He’s woken by Nott’s gentle shaking just before the car slows to a stop.

Nott scrambles over him to spill out of the car while Caleb takes his time to come back to his senses and will his aching neck and back to cooperate with him. He sees her dart off but loses track of her as he gets out and stretches. A few joints pop and his muscles release from hours of sleeping awkwardly, and he finally notices his surroundings. He assumes they’ve reached their first stop of the trip: Trostenwald, a quaint, historic town known more for its alcohol than anything else. The cobbled streets lined with creaking houses slope this way and that. Beyond the small parking lot, he spots a rustic looking building that wouldn’t be out of place in one of his historic fiction novels.  _The Nestled Nook Inn_ , a rusting sign declares itself.

“Morning, sleeping beauty.”

Molly startles him with a hand against his shoulder as he saunters past. Caleb doesn’t miss the amused smirk it brings to Molly’s lips.

“We are staying here?” he asks, following the other.

“Yep,” Molly replies. “Jester picked some place random on Google, not that there’s really much choice here.”

They linger by Fjord’s truck as the man in question hands various items of luggage down from the truck bed to Yasha waiting below. He gives them a wave and points to Caleb and Nott’s luggage.

“Hey, I left yours for you. Nott ran straight past; think she’s checking us in with Jester.”

Caleb nods at this and heaves his bag over one shoulder. Before he can reach for Nott’s, Beau appears from nowhere and beats him to it. “I got it.” She lazily slings it across her back and Caleb thinks he sees her shoot a surreptitious look to Yasha. “Need anything else carrying?”

“No, no, I think I am good.”

Molly stays behind with the others as Beau leads him through a heavy door with squeaking hinges. Jester’s excited babbling isn’t hard to pick out. 

“Okay, we have two rooms,” Jester announces, wielding the two keys like blades in combat. “There’s five beds in each room so I said we would take five beds in one room and two in the other. I’m rooming with Beau.”

Beau cracks a wide grin. “Aw, yeah, roomies!”

The girls take two of the beds in an empty room and the remaining travellers spill into the other. Molly immediately claims the lone single bed as Nott scrambles up the ladder of one of the bunk beds. Caleb takes the bottom bunk and watches as Fjord drops his bag on the other. Yasha seems to have no preference for top or bottom bunk, despite Caleb offering to swap. He’s quietly glad for this; he gets nervous when separated from Nott. She claims he acts like a duckling that’s strayed from its mother; it never fails to make Caleb chuckle.

He settles down onto the bed and pulls out his phone. A quick search brings up the few local amenities; an antiquated-looking book store in the marketplace catches his eye. He seems to not be the only one researching their current abode as he hears Fjord excitedly discussing renting a boat and teaching Nott to fish on the lake.

“Oh—I—uh, I don’t really like being in water,” Nott says from her bunk.

“Well, we’d just be in the boat, not actually in the water.”

“Uh…” Her head appears from over the edge of the bed as she dangles down from above to peer at Caleb. “Do you want to go to the lake, Caleb?”

“Ah, perhaps later. I think I will go pick up a new book first.” He can see the conflict in her eyes as she hesitates in her usual assurance that she’ll gladly accompany him. “You are welcome to come with me, I don’t mind.”

She clambers down to the floor to better hold the conversation between the two men. “We could get a book and then read it by the lake after? And maybe fish if there’s a big sturdy boat?”

Fjord grins as she looks over. “I’ll find the biggest and sturdiest boat I can.”

“I can help you with sailing it,” Yasha chimes in. No one seems surprised at her apparent naval skills.

“Well, I, for one, am going to sunbathe and possibly swim if the lake isn’t too disgusting.” Molly accompanies his announcement by swinging a packed tote bag over one shoulder. “I’m gonna check on the girls.”

“They’re probably fucking,” Yasha points out. Molly doesn’t waver in his saunter towards the door and winks at her as he passes.

The moment lingers awkwardly. Caleb clears his throat. “So… To the market, ja?”

“Yes! I’ll grab my purse!” Nott exclaims, scrambling back up the ladder. Caleb decides not to point out that she rarely pays for goods on their outings between Caleb’s soft heart and her own sticky fingers. “We’ll come find you later, Fjord, yeah?”

Her foresight to not give a specified time works to their advantage. As soon as they navigate their way to the store, with copious help from Google Maps, Nott loses Caleb immediately. He makes a sound that can be only described as an eager squeak and vanishes from her side. She meanders about the bookcases but nothing really catches her interest. She’s not as avid a reader as Caleb; she hasn’t read for pleasure since probably before college. She can appreciate the atmosphere, though. The scent of old books mingles with an inherent dusty tang, resulting in something not unpleasant but definitely acquired. Mismatched bookshelves line the walls and form aisles about the space, each shelf stuffed top to bottom with books of all shapes, sizes, and colours. A few of the shinier volumes draw her attention, but she forces herself on. 

Only a couple of minutes pass before she runs into Caleb and he already has a stack of books cradled in his arms. He’s in a world of his own and reaching for yet another tome, completely oblivious to her presence.

“You’re not allowed to get anymore work books.”

A short gasp catches in throat and he just about manages to not drop anything. “I’m allowed to buy anything I please,” he says, playing off his jumpiness with feigned bravado. 

“Get some of that bad smut of yours, just no more work.”

Caleb rolls his eyes. “These are books for pleasure that happen to coincide with my research interests. And there is no smut in this store, I checked.”

“Already? I only left you for a minute!”

When he’s completed his first lap of the store, he enlists Nott’s help to carry his chosen books. Each must be decades old at least, previously read and evidently well-loved, worn in all the best ways a book can be. He’s skipped over the more decadent of volumes scattered about the place; he doubts they’d survive well over the coming fortnight.

“Are you actually getting all of these? There’s, like, a dozen books here.”

“Yes?” Caleb replies. “That should last two weeks.”

“But what if you want to go to other book shops along the way?”

That gives Caleb pause for thought. Rather regretfully, he returns a few books to the shelves.

Nott texts the others when they finally leave the store. Enough time has passed for seeds of worry to begin to take root for those who aren’t aware of just how big of a bookworm Caleb is. He already has his nose buried in the first of his many books. When asked what it’s about, he only responds with a grunt. Nott, used to pulling Caleb this way and that to avoid obstacles, navigates him towards the outskirts of the town.

“What’s it called? The rooster lake?”

Caleb tuts at her. “Ustaloch. It’s Zemnian.”

“Oh, that makes more sense. I was wondering why there would be roosters at a lake.”

Jester’s screeches guide them to the others’ exact location. As they near, Caleb realises that she is actually laughing loudly and yelling at Molly as they splash about the water. Molly grins wickedly at her, actions lightning quick as he leaps towards her to dunk her head under the water. Further out but still reasonably close to the shore, a small, simple boat sits on the quiet lake. Fjord sees them coming and waves. He’s waded through the shallow waters by the time the duo makes it over.

“Ignore those two, they’re scaring all the fish. You get what you wanted?”

Caleb nods. “I got a couple of books, yes.”

“He almost bought the whole store!” Nott exclaims. “Is that your boat?”

Fjord offers a crooked smile. “Sure is. I hired it for a few hours. Not much but it floats and turns, if ya still wanted to go fishin’.”

“Sure. Are there life jackets?” She’s already following Fjord closer to the boat. “Do you want to come, Caleb?”

Caleb declines the offer, instead deciding to stay ashore and settle down to continue his book. He dangles his feet in the water and Jester attempts to coax him further in a few times, seemingly undeterred by his complete disdain towards the idea. He even gives the excuse of not having swimming trunks with him and Molly simply quips that he’s happy to go skinny dipping. Caleb checks out of the conversation at that point.

He sets the book aside some time later. Molly and Jester have tired themselves out, now laid out in the late afternoon sun to bask in the lingering warmth. Caleb has no idea how Fjord’s quest to educate Nott in the way of fishing is going; they’ve navigated out a fair way and he can’t see anything of them except the outline of their figures sitting on the deck.

A pair of footsteps signals the arrival of the last duo of the group. Caleb looks over as Beau and Yasha approach, making their way towards them from the crop of trees by the far end of the lake.

“How was your hike?” Jester asks, peeking out from beneath the arm thrown over her eyes.

“Good, it was good,” says Beau, voice strained. She stands by Yasha and watches as the woman continues across the distance towards the lazing Tieflings. Molly extends a hand to her and she takes a seat beside him.

“You were gone for a while,” Molly comments. Jester makes a scissoring motion with her fingers behind Yasha’s back. Beau blushes heavily but shoves Jester as she passes.

A familiar ache weighs heavy against Caleb’s chest as he watches the group. They seem so intimately familiar with each other in a way he hasn’t experienced in years.

Almost as if sensing his oncoming distress, Nott calls to him from the nearing boat gliding across the lake. “Caleb! I caught two fish!” Caleb smiles softly as the boat nears the shore. He waits until Nott's scrambling to the land to congratulate her on her newfound skills. She's already rambling about how long it had taken to get her first bite and how she'd almost given up before she reaches him.

“Hey, Nott, do you want to play in the water?” Jester calls over.

Nott freezes. “I can’t swim,” she replies.

Jester has already bounded over to the goblin and taken her hand. “We can teach you!”

Before she’s even taken her seat beside Caleb, Nott is whisked off. Caleb almost feels as if he should step in when Nott throws a panicked look in his direction but she provides no further argument. Jester’s plan seems to rally the troop as everyone opts to involve themselves in Nott’s impromptu swimming lesson. The space beside Caleb is taken, anyway, as Fjord docks the boat and ambles lazily over.

“Good book?”

“So far, yes.” His hand skirts across the spine of the book in his lap. He’s made his way through a solid chunk of it; a leaf he’s using as an impromptu bookmark sticks out from just over halfway through the pages.

“What’s it about?”

“It’s, uh… about Arcane runes.” He’s acutely aware of how dull that must sound. He’s prepared to change the topic and bat away Fjord’s polite yet feigned interest in the subject matter, when instead Fjord simply lights up.

“Arcane?” Fjord’s eyes widen and his smile grows. “You work in that area, don’t you? Nott mentioned it. Said you’re real good with magic.”

“Um, yes. I mean, I work in the area, I can’t guarantee how good I am at it.”

“Mind if I ask you about it? I’m not all that talented but I have a bit of a fascination with it.”

Calen can’t hide the small smile the question brings to his lips. He lives his day to day life discussing his work with those outside of his department in a way that erases all the excitement from it. He’s dedicated his life to research inspired by his passion for learning and endless curiosity. Too often he’s had people fake smiles and nod along as he explains his current projects, their eyes glazing over as they decide the topic at hand is too boring for their taste. It's refreshing to have someone as excited by this as he is. 

“Ask away. I didn’t know you were interested in it.”

“He’s  _very_  interested!” Jester calls from the water. Caleb and Fjord shoot her looks of confusion and exasperation respectively, before Molly covers her mouth with his hand and pulls her under the water.

“Anyway…” Fjord continues, chuckling somewhat awkwardly. As it turns out, Fjord is more educated in the Arcane arts than Caleb had expected. His basic knowledge and terminology leave much to be desired but he catches onto core concepts and follows Caleb’s logic with ease as he discusses the major points brought forward by his book.

“Hey, nerds,” Beau calls. “You guys ready for food?”

“Hell yeah,” Fjord replies enthusiastically. “I’m starved.”

He pushes himself to his feet and extends a hand down to Caleb, pulling him up with ease.

The hostel offers a modest variety of meals. Once they’ve filled themselves with hearty dishes and lounged through the accumulated weariness from the day’s activities, the group assembles in main room. Jester brings over a hand mirror and a battered makeup bag, and only smiles when questioned about it.

“We are going out,” she announces.

“We are?” Nott repeats.

“Yes. I want to go dancing.”

“That sounds like a fantastic idea,” Molly says from his bed. Yasha is sat against his headboard and seems to not mind Molly’s head propped in her lap. “I’ve got something on me if you wanted to get a little inebriated, Jes.”

“Enough to share with the class?” Beau asks. Molly only offers a lazy shrug in response.

“I’m going to stay here,” Yasha says.

Quietly, Caleb is glad she spoke up, yet at the same time is vaguely terrified of the prospect of being alone with Yasha should he opt to stay in. He’s usually happy to partake in a little drinking and merriment but it’s been a long day with new people. He’s beyond exhausted and needs time to himself to recover. Nott seems to expect this of him but he ushers her to join her friends when she offers to stay back too.

It turns out he has little to worry about. Yasha isn’t one for small talk either and they coexist peacefully as the others filter out of the room, loose with booze and dolled up more than is probably expected in a town like Trostenwald. Yasha watches something on her phone with headphones in for a while and eventually announces that she’s going to bed. Instead of straining his eyes trying to read by the pathetic reading light offered by the hostel, he vacates the room to read in the communal lounge.

His eyes grow heavy over time as he delves deeper and deeper into the book. As he’s about to call it a night—or morning by this point—he hears a commotion from the foyer. He flicks the lounge’s lights off as he exits and watches for a moment as Fjord pulls Jester towards the staircase ever so gently, hands at her hips to keep her steady and voice low as he murmurs words of quiet encouragement as she tackles the stairs. Caleb intends to remain hidden but Jester spots him nonetheless.

“Caleeeeeeb!”

Fjord glances over and offers a sheepish smile. “Jes, shush. People ‘re sleeping.”

“Is she okay?” Caleb asks as Jester holds the bannister with a vice-like grip.

“Yeah, just high as a kite.”

“I am in complete control of myself,” Jester assures him. Or herself, it's hard to say.

She manages three stairs before giving into Fjord’s offer and allowing herself to be scooped up in his arms and carried to her room—“like a blushing bride”, as she says.

“We both know there’s nothin’ that makes you blush,” Fjord mutters. Jester cackles in delight.

Caleb follows them to Jester’s room and takes the key offered by the Tiefling, hurriedly fumbling to unlock the door for the couple. Fjord sets her down carefully and Caleb leaves him to it. He feels odd for intruding.

Fjord joins him back in the room as Caleb's putting his belongings away and settling down for the night. Fjord tiptoes over to his own bunk and slumps down wearily.

“All good?” Caleb whispers.

Fjord chuckles softly as he strips himself of the evening’s attire, hands fumbling just enough to betray his own state of intoxication. “Yeah. Got her in bed and she has water by her. Couldn’t get her makeup off, though. She was too busy telling me to check on Molly in the morning. ‘We don’t know who he’s with, Fjord, they might be  _serial killers’_.” Fjord recounts Jester’s antics with an amusingly accurate portrayal of her accent. “How come you’re still up?”

“I was reading,” Caleb admits. Having washed his face and changed his clothes, he feels more awake than he had only a few minutes ago. He’s half tempted to reach for his book again and read until exhaustion takes him for the night.

“The rune book? Learn anything interesting?” Fjord settles himself down onto the bunk; Caleb can only see his silhouette stretched out across the bed. Caleb hums in return. He doubts Fjord wants to hear the details of mistranslations and their repercussions throughout various cultures when he’s trying to sleep. Surprising him once again, Fjord asks, “Read it to me, will ya?”

The proposal strikes him as bizarre. He can’t see Fjord’s expression in the darkness but is well aware that Fjord can easily see his, and he agrees to the request after a moment of silent deliberation. The book is already within reach in its position by his pillow. It’s somewhat of a strain to make out the words in the dim light but Fjord doesn’t object to Caleb’s staccato reading as he tries to decipher the more shadowed words. He makes it through a couple of pages before the low rumble of the Orc’s snores interrupts him. He huffs a silent laugh to himself and closes the book. He debates continuing to keep himself awake until Nott returns safely but the thought slips through his fingers as his head settles to the pillow and sleep finally claims him.


	3. Chapter 3

Caleb isn’t sure what wakes him to begin with. He feels rested but his mind still has a morning haze clouding his thoughts; he’d much rather settle back down and catch another hour or so of sleep when someone prods him.

“Hey, Caleb. Caleb. Are you awake?”

A deep sigh escapes him. He rubs at his weary eyes as he peers up at Jester blearily. She looks far too chipper and lively.

“I’m getting breakfast, do you want to come with me?”

He pushes himself up. Despite her question, he feels he doesn’t have much say in the matter.

“Great! Get dressed, I want pastries. Also shower. You need a shower.” As wildly and suddenly as she’d appeared, she’s gone. Caleb is sorely tempted to ignore her request and go back to sleep but with the idea of breakfast in his mind, his stomach makes the decision for him. He supposes he can always grab coffee while they’re out—a _lot_ of coffee.

The shower rouses him a little. The hostel isn’t the most advanced of establishments and despite being the first or second person to use the shower, there’s practically no hot water left. He gives himself a cursory scrub with a withered bar of soap and redresses with haste. Jester’s already waiting for him when he makes his way downstairs. She’s thrown on a pastel blue summer frock and paired her bubblegum pink bag with lipstick of a matching shade. A bright grin curves her lips as he descends the stairs to join her.

“I asked about bakeries at the front desk and the woman said there’s one just around the corner!” She skips past morning pleasantries entirely and instead takes Caleb by the arm and pulls him along. “You smell better. We should get you cologne. And deodorant.”

A beat passes before Caleb registers what she said and he isn’t sure if he should be offended. He’s quickly learning to not question Jester; talking to her feels a lot like being swept up by a crashing wave—it’s best not to fight it.

“We’re getting breakfast for everyone?” he asks.

“You’re slow in the morning,” she remarks. “I need extra hands to carry everything. Do you like croissants? I want croissants. How do you take your coffee?”

“Uh, black with two sugars. And I like croissants.”

Jester taps at her temple with a wink. “I’ll add that to the list.”

Caleb’s unsure of what she means until he finds himself standing awkwardly beside her as she rattles off seven consecutive orders, Caleb’s added to the end of an obviously well-rehearsed list. She pulls out a purse from her bag and Caleb tries not to notice the stack of notes held within it.

“How much is mine?” he asks, pulling out his own battered wallet.

Jester scoffs. “It’s on me! It’s super cheap anyway.”

Caleb, who’d heard the total price, begs to differ but he isn’t one to turn down free food.

Rousing the troops turns out to be an easier affair than anticipated when the deal is sweetened with coffee and baked goods. Nott rouses and climbs down to Caleb’s bunk, where she wraps herself in his blanket and sips at her coffee. Fjord, in contrast, barely sits up before he knocks back his coffee in three large gulps. Yasha, who Caleb now realises hadn’t been in the room when they’d left, returns clad in running gear and takes the offered breakfast with a kind thanks. Jester pauses by Molly’s bed and then spins about, searching for the missing Tiefling.

“Where’s Molly?”

“Went home with someone,” Fjord replies, voice gruff with morning roughness.

“Ohhh, I remember.”

“I already texted him, he’s on his way over,” Yasha adds.

Caleb retreats to his bed and sits beside Nott. She rests her head against his shoulder with a yawn and gladly takes the pastry Caleb offers her. Caleb watches as Jester darts off to grab Beau from their room as Fjord and Yasha discuss the upcoming day. Beau looks to have been bodily pulled out of bed as she stumbles behind Jester. She aims straight for Fjord’s bed and the Orc shifts so she can fall face first onto the mattress beside him.

“I want to go to the museum. They’ll have pretty things for me to draw,” Jester announces.

“There’s a museum here?” Beau asks, or at least that’s what Caleb thinks she asks. Her voice is muffled by Fjord’s pillow and she makes no effort to move and make herself more audible.

“Mhm, it’s a lot of boring history stuff but there should be some cool things to draw.”

“I’ll come with you,” Fjord says. “Beau will too.”

Beau offers a noncommittal noise in response, which Jester takes as affirmation of Fjord’s statement. She claps her hands giddily and turns to Yasha.

“Sure,” Yasha says, shrugging. “Sounds decent. I need to go deal with a couple of things later, though.”

Jester’s eyes finally land on Caleb and Nott. Caleb jostles the Goblin slightly to rouse her.

“Hm? Oh. I wanted to go to this antique store…” Nott says, eyes downcast, avoiding Jester’s inquisitive stare.

Jester, however, simply smiles. “That’s okay, Nott. You can find me something pretty!”

It seems to be assumed by everyone that Caleb will accompany her. The expected question never comes his way and while he’s glad to be spared of explaining his stance, he’s aware that he’s doing little to alter his position as an outsider to this group.

He’s spared from spiralling further into these thoughts as Molly brazenly enters, his clothes, obviously those from last night, collar and neckline not quite covering the mess of marks littering his neck and chest. “Did I miss much? Oh, breakfast. Thank you, Jester.”

“Are you okay, Molly? You look like you got _attacked_ ,” Jester says as she hands over a cup of lukewarm coffee and a small paper bag of leftover pastries.

“It was a consensual attack.” Molly takes a seat on his bed and wrinkles his nose as he sips at his drink. “What are our plans for today?”

“I’m going to a museum,” Jester chimes.

“Nott and I are going to an antique store,” Caleb says, filling in for Nott as she sneaks another pastry. “The one we saw yesterday?” It’s more of a question than a statement, and Nott nods.

“It was in the marketplace,” she says, a few crumbs of pastry spitting from her mouth.

Molly smiles. “Oh, that sounds fun. Do you mind if I come with you? I’ve been meaning to pick up some new jewellery.”

“Not at all,” Caleb replies.

Nott freezes. “Oh. Um. Did you two want to go alone? Since, y’know.” To Caleb’s horror, she makes a vaguely sexual hand gesture. Fjord snorts a laugh and Molly only just contains his mirth.

“That’s flattering, Nott, but I think I’ll survive,” Molly says. Caleb shoots him an ireful glare. The Tiefling only winks in response.

With their plans set for the day, they mill about, getting dressed and snooping out any remaining food. Caleb returns to his book as he waits for Nott and Molly. Nott takes only a few minutes to appear by his side, washed and changed with her hair still a tangled mess, but Molly takes his time. Contrasting Jester’s bright pops of makeup, Molly’s is subtler, designed to enhance rather than wow. He emphasises his cheekbones and darkens his lash line. Caleb suspects that a chunk of the time it takes him to get ready is dedicated to concealing a few of the darker marks on his neck. When he finally joins them, rather gaudy and flashy in his attire compared to Caleb’s simple, if somewhat battered, outfit, Nott sets off to lead the way.

Caleb finds his mind wandering as Nott natters away, keeping up a steady flow of conversation with Molly. The man seems to have taken a mentor role in her life. He’s heard her talk about Molly many times before, speaking of him as more of a friend than her manager, but he’s never seen them interact as such. Molly handles her well, Caleb thinks.

“Are you after anything in particular?” Molly asks.

Nott shrugs. “Something pretty and shiny. And then something just pretty for Jester—maybe a nice scarf or a bracelet.”

“That sounds like a fantastic idea.”

Without his tunnel vision of being on the lookout for books, Caleb better appreciates the quaint marketplace Trostenwald has to offer. There are a fair few pubs and diners, groceries stores that look like they’ve seen better days, bakers and jewellers and who knows what else—and amongst all of it, an antique store.

“Should we keep an eye on her?” Molly murmurs, slowing his pace to fall back and speak to the wizard. Caleb gives a confused look. “In case she gets… itchy.”

“Ah.” Caleb looks from Molly over to his small friend. He shrugs. “If she can get away with it then I probably won’t stop her.”

Molly raises a brow at that. “We’re advocating theft? I think I had you down all wrong, Widogast.”

“And how exactly did you have me down?” As soon as it leaves his lips, Caleb realises how Molly would twist his words. Before the other can part his wicked grin to speak, Caleb says, “Don’t answer that,” and hurries on to catch up to Nott.

 

* * *

 

Molly wanders off to browse the products alone as Nott sets off in a different direction. Caleb looks between the two and, after a moment, follows Nott, finding her crouched before a small bowl of marbles on a low shelf. He says nothing as he lets her rummage through the glass spheres, holding each one that takes her fancy up to the light to inspect it more clearly. He can’t determine the criteria she seems to be judging them with, but she seems perfectly content in finding little knickknacks to hoard. His gaze roams over the shelves around him but little of their contents interests him; the establishment seems to be more of a hidden treasure cave than anything else. Caleb isn’t particularly taken by trinkets and jewellery but he’s happy in aiding Nott as she explores the wares.

“Do you think this one is shinier? It has a little dent in it but I think it gives it character.” She thrusts a marble into his vision. It’s almost perfectly clear with a blossom of blue swirls frozen within it.

“Ah, ja, sure. It is very shiny.”

“Yes, I thought so too.” She pockets the marble and Caleb pretends not to see. She takes his hand to lead him further into the store, still babbling as they walk. “Anyway, there’s probably books in here. Do you want to look at them? You look a bit bored, you can have gone off with Molly. Since that’s apparently a thing now.”

“You told me yesterday to not get more bo—wait, what are you implying there?”

He stops dead in his tracks and gives her a weary look. He knows her friends can be raucous and teasing; he’d rather hoped to avoid these comments while away from them.

Nott only shrugs her shoulders in a half-hearted response. “Well, you seem to like him. And you didn’t tell me about that _thing_ , so—”

“Wait, are you angry about that?”

Nott sighs. “Not _angry_. Just… I though we told each other stuff. And that’s a weird thing to keep a secret.”

Caleb’s brows furrow. “I think it is a normal thing to keep secret. You wanted me to tell you I slept with your manager-slash-friend while drunk?”

“No, I wanted you to tell me about your love life!”

Caleb can’t help but snort at that. He’s never had much of a love life and one drunken tumble certainly doesn’t qualify as a change in that. “I don’t talk about that kind of thing.”

“That’s because there’s never anything to talk about because all you do is _work_. Picking up a stranger in a bar is pretty big news for you!”

Caleb’s not sure if he should be offended and is still deciding when someone clears their throat behind him.

“I’m not sure you’re all too concern about this,” says Molly’s smooth timbre, “but you are discussing this _quite_ loudly for all of the store to hear.”

Caleb feels the tips of his ears heat with embarrassment, but Nott merely thrust an accusatory finger at Molly. “And you! You always talk about who you sleep with. How did you not tell me either?”

Molly only smiles and moves forwards to ruffle her hair, ignoring how she bats his hand away. “Nott, if I truly talked about everyone I slept with then I’d never be able to shut up.”

Nott mumbles something that sounds suspiciously like “you never shut up anyway” and pivots on her heel to walk away. Caleb hesitates, then follows. Molly takes his lead and stays at his heels.

“Is she mad?” Molly asks.

“No?” His answer isn’t quite as reassuring as he’d hoped. He knows Nott isn’t upset about his actions with Molly, only that Caleb had elected to keep it to himself. “Honestly, I forgot about the whole ordeal until recently. I thought she knew by now.”

Molly seems greatly amused at being called an ‘ordeal’ but lets it slide without comment. “I thought you might have wanted to keep it quiet. You seemed pretty private.”

Caleb frowns. “Then how did everyone else…?”

“Jester.”

“Ah.”

“Speaking of which.” Molly pats his shoulder as he slips by to catch up with Nott. “Nott, I found some things Jester would like. Come help me choose something?”

“O-oh! Sure!” Nott lets herself be led over to a chaotic section of haphazardly stored jewels and beads, and just like that the situation smooths itself over. Caleb feels somewhat on edge still, as if he has to explain himself, but no one asks for that explanation. He wants to address the worries nagging at him—that Nott was annoyed at him, irritated with his decision—but she doesn’t bring it up again. She doesn’t even throw him a single malicious look. She simply hurries to take his hand again and pulls him over to give his opinion on the pearl necklace or the pink ring. He doesn’t know Jester very well but he sides in favour of the ring and Nott agrees whole heartedly.

“You look happier, Caleb,” she says, as she waits by the counter for the lonely staff member to return and ring up her purchases, minus the few bits and bobs she’d snuck into her pockets.

Caleb isn’t sure what to say in response. He hadn’t been particularly elated in that moment, but equally he hasn’t felt nearly as stressed or weary as he usually does in the last few days. He’s a tad anxious, sure—being around new people does that to him—but the group seem to accept him, or at the very least tolerate him. No one has been outwardly hostile—yet—so he’s counting it as a win thus far.

“I suppose I am a little bit happier, yes.”

He’s not trying to be funny, yet Nott laughs anyway.

 

* * *

 

“And as I watched the manticore swipe at its next victim, I found this little wooden ship—here you go, Fjord—and, oh! Jester! Look, this is for you!”

Nott relishes in her role of gift giver for the afternoon while simultaneously re-enacting the apparently treacherous trek through the antique store. Caleb must not have been paying attention to all the beasts and traps that littered their path through the shop, but he’s happy to sit back and let Nott and Molly entertain the others with their whimsical tales.

“And then Caleb, oh brave, sweet Caleb, shot a gigantic fireball at the creature! It screamed so loudly I thought my ears were going to bleed! _But_ —it was still standing.”

Molly gasped dramatically. “How could it be? Is this creature invincible?”

“No, Molly! It is not!”

“Not? You’re right! It was _Nott_ who, screaming like a banshee, ran at the manticore with a short sword. The poor beast didn’t have time to see her coming!” Molly exclaimed, swinging his arm wildly, mimicking Nott’s apparent swordplay. “She swung and she stabbed and fought with all her might! Ans thus… the beast fell.”

Beau and Jester whooped from their seats, ever the enthusiastic audience. Fjord had only just regained control of his infectious chuckles. Caleb caught his eye and sent him off snickering again.

“Sounds like you guys got up to an awful lotta trouble for such a small town,” Fjord drawls as the group calms down. “You’re lucky to be alive.”

“Oh, Fjord, it was terrifying! Truly, utterly horrific. But we pressed on, and found you all lovely gifts despite our woes.”

“So, so brave. Thank you for your sacrifice,” Fjord replies, voice dropping to give a sombre tone.

“What sacrifice?”

Beau jumps at the voice and grins. “Yasha! Hey, you missed it. Molly, Caleb, and Nott got caught up in this totally epic, totally real battle at the antique store.”

“Oh, did they?” Yasha quirks an eyebrow as she nears, stopping as she reaches Molly’s seat and placing a hand atop his shoulder.

Molly settles a hand absent-mindedly over Yasha’s but throws Beau a scorned look. “Beauregard, are you insinuating that we _embellished_ the tales of our shopping spree?”

Beau gives a shit-eating grin. “If it was any more embellished it would be as sparkly as you.”

“I’ll have you know I am the _perfect_ amount of sparkly.” He switches gears before Beau can draw him further into bickering. “You get up to much, Yash’?”

“Yeah, just ran a few errands. Are we still staying another night? Because I saw they were finishing setting up a circus on the other side of town.” Her soft-spoken words do wonders to draw everyone’s attention.

“A circus?!” Jester screeches. “Ooh, can we go? Can we go?” She looks wildly between the group, eyes wide with wonder and a grin at her lips.

“Is it open tonight?” Fjord asks. Yasha nods. “I don’t see why not, if other people are up for it.”

Jester erupts in cheers and Nott seems just about ready to join her. Her bright eyes and elated expression are enough to remind Caleb of how child-like she could be at times. He feels his heart soften as he watches her chat excitedly with Jester. She’d been denied the chance to be young so many times; he’s glad she has a family now with which she can be so open and carefree.

“This okay with you, Caleb?”

Fjord’s twang startled him and the man gives a sheepish smile, silently apologising for rustling Caleb so suddenly from his thoughts.

“Yes. It sounds… interesting.”

Fjord’s smile melts into a more genuine expression and he nods his agreement. “Haven’t been to the circus since I was a kid.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever been.”

“Well, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it. Probably won’t be as magical when you know how to do it all yourself but still—it’s the spectacle that makes it. I’m sure you’ll have fun.”

Fjord’s little speech surprises him. He stares for just a moment too long but Fjord only gives him an easy grin.

 

* * *

 

They stumble out of the gigantic tent, buzzing with excitement, drunk on elation. Jester leads the way, Beau and Nott linked arm-in-arm with her, as she drags them off to buy more candy. Yasha and Molly follow, citing thirst and the need for the spiced drink they could smell, as Molly regales the girls with the tale of how he’d once almost joined a circus. Caleb waits for a moment as they wander off, relishing the cool air after hours of the stuffy tent. The show had been wonderous, worth at least twice what they’d paid for; each act was like a story told through song, dance, and something Caleb didn’t know how to label. Time suspended itself as they performed. They captivated their audience and transported them to a realm where nothing was quite real. Caleb, notorious for needing to understand how every little thing works, suspended his disbelief and let himself enjoy the show. It didn’t matter that he knew the spells that were cast, that he could see wires or safety nets. The joy was real.

“That was _incredible_ ,” Fjord says, knocking his shoulder against Caleb’s as he joins him. They stand off to the side, within eyesight of the others but not in the way of fellow patrons trying to get by.

“Yes, it was really good.”

“You had fun, then?”

Caleb gives a tilt of a smile. “I did. I liked the act with the suspended water. That was very clever.”

“Course you’d like the clever ones,” Fjord jests. Caleb feels the defensive urge to back away from the interaction, but he knows Fjord means nothing but kindness. “I’m glad you liked it. Haven’t really had much of a chance to see you around these past couple days.”

“Oh, I…” Caleb realises, with a jolt, that he hasn’t engaged in any group activities or really spoken to anyone who isn’t Nott. He’d slept through the journey down and bowed out of most group activities. It isn’t in his nature to be particularly outgoing yet his habitual preference for isolation and lone activities seems to have taken hold by default. “My apologies, I hadn’t noticed.”

“Nah, you’re good. Just thought I’d let you know that you’re welcome to join in with anything. Personally, I’d like to get to know you a li’l better, if that’s alright with you.”

Caleb determines that this man must be destined to continually surprise him. He bites down the knee-jerk response of saying there’s no need; he’s just Caleb, no one interesting, no one worth going out of his way for. He catches himself and halts that train of thought. He’s here with Nott’s friends and he’d said he’d make an effort with them. It would be rude of him to turn down such an obvious offer of friendship.

After a moment, Caleb replies with a small, secret smile, “Are you hoping for free Arcane tuition?”

Fjord pauses for a second, then catches onto Caleb’s dry humour and cracks a bright grin. “Dang it, you caught me. Foiled again.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the chapter document titles on my laptop has so far been:  
> 1\. asdfghjkl  
> 2\. sdfghjkl  
> 3\. dfghjkl


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn't mean to not update for like 6 weeks but i did manage to write other fics in between 
> 
> thank you for all your comments, i've fallen behind on replying to them but i definitely read and appreciated them!!

“Is it bigger than this car?”

“Yes.”

“Is it bigger than a swimming pool?”

“Yes.”

“Is it…” Nott furrows her brow and looks around, eyes narrowed in concentration. “Um…”

“Jes,” Fjord interrupts, a smile at his lips as he smoothly guides his car along the road. “Is it tangible?”

“Well, _technically_ , no,” Jester replies. Fjord snorts a laugh.

“Jes, you’re meant to pick things you can see,” Fjord says, amusement dancing in his voice.

With a groan, Nott slumps in her seat. “You can’t keep picking invisible things! That’s not the point of ‘I spy’!”

“But _technically_ you _can_ see it! It’s made of particles and you can see particles! It’s not my fault we’re not good at seeing teensy, tiny things.” Wild gestures accompany Jester’s explanation of how fear of the unknown is a valid subject for ‘I spy’. The open bottle of nail polish in her hand threatens to spill; Caleb supposes it’s lucky that she’s in the seat behind Fjord, where he can’t see how perilously close his precious car is to being coated in hot pink. The intoxicating scent of the varnish is overwhelming and the battering of humid air as they drive with the windows down to counteract it isn’t conducive to a calming reading environment. Caleb has set his book aside in favour of watching chaos unfold in the back seats, his stomach unsettled by a combination of factors. It’s just him, Fjord, Nott, and Jester in the car; he’d expected to ride in the back with Nott but Jester had forcibly removed him from his seat so she could more easily paint Nott’s nails. Nott, who has never been adept at sitting still or practicing patience, had taken up an increasingly obscure game of ‘I spy’ to pass the time. She’s twice smudged the wet pain on her nails; Jester has yet to complain about having to redo them.

“Are you okay, Caleb?”

Nott’s sudden volume and appearance, sticking her head between him and Fjord as she leans forwards, makes Caleb jump. He bats a hand in her direction. “Yes, yes. I’m fine,” he placates. Even to his own ears, he doesn’t sound particularly convincing.

Nott sits back. He doesn’t need to look over his shoulder to know she’s frowning and sending him a worried look. Jester’s stage-whispered question as to what’s wrong with him is likely louder than she thinks it is. Nott’s hushed explanation that Caleb gets carsick is equally vociferous. Caleb rolls his eyes.

“I’m _fine_ ,” he repeats. The nail polish fumes hadn’t mixed well with his non-stop reading. The nausea has subsided somewhat since its initial onset; it’s not something he wants to make a big deal of.

“We can pull over if you want a breather,” Fjord says to him quietly, going unnoticed by the duo in the back who’ve resumed their tumultuous game. “I wouldn’t mind stretching my legs myself.”

“No, no, really, I’m fine.” And he’d very much like to stop being centre of attention now.

“You should try some of Molly’s special tea,” Jester pipes up. “It cures _everything_.”

“Uh, Jes. I’m pretty sure Molly’s “special” tea is spiked with somethin’ a li’l less than savoury,” Fjord says.

Jester rolls her eyes. “Well, _duh_. That’s what makes it special!”

“Oh, by the way,” Fjord starts, resting his arm across the back of Caleb’s seat as he twists around to briefly look at Jester. “How are things goin’ with Molly?”

Caleb glances over his shoulder in time to see a wicked smile curve Jester’s lips.

“Oh, is it time for gossiping now? Because I have _lots_ of gossip.”

“It’s not ‘gossip time’. I was just checkin’ on you guys,” Fjord explains, turning back to face the road.

Jester leans forward over the gap between his and Fjord’s seats to press a kiss to the man’s cheek. “You’re sweet, Fjord. Molly is just Molly, though.” As she settles back into her seat, Caleb finds himself utterly lost with the direction of the conversation, but keeps his confusion to himself. His befuddlement only heightens as Jester asks, “How long do you think it will be before Molly pulls over to kick Beau out?”

Fjord chuckles deeply. “I reckon he’ll manage another hour or so.”

“He’ll probably make her switch with Caleb since he’s less noisy than Beau,” Jester says. “And he doesn’t make googoo eyes at people he wants to fuck.”

Oblivious to his rising blush and complete confusion, Nott pipes up, “If Molly trades Beau for Caleb then I’m going too. I’m not fourth wheeling.”

Caleb, awkward in most social situations and only growing more uneasy as the others advance, leaving him entirely lost, finally caves. “May I just ask, um…” Eyes turn to him. He’s not exactly sure _what_ he wants to ask.

“Oh! I haven’t drawn you one of my pictures yet!” Jester’s exclamation seems to make sense to Fjord and Nott. Caleb can only twist in his seat to give a bemused stare as she caps her nail polish and rummages about in her seemingly bottomless bag. With a joyous cry, she pulls forth a battered sketch pad and a broken pencil. She thumbs through the pages, passing over detailed landscapes, rough portraits, and a few risqué images Caleb isn’t sure he was supposed to see, and stops as she reaches a blank page.

“What are you—”

She cuts him off with a shush. At the top of the page, she draws a smiling face with short, curled hair protruding horns. “This is me,” she explains. She draws two lines from the drawing; on one end she sketches a rugged Orc and the other, a scowling Human. “That’s Fjord, that’s Beau. Me and Fjord are dating, and me and Beau are dating. Fjord and Beau aren’t dating but they go to the gym together a lot.” Caleb isn’t sure why the last nugget of information is necessary, but she’s sketching away again before he can question her logic. “This is Yasha.” Her newest drawing depicts Yasha’s flowing locks and deadpan expression. She draws hearts around Beau’s head and connects the two women with a dotted line. “Beau likes women who can crush her head between their thighs so obviously she wants to bang Yasha.” She adds a Tiefling, a Goblin, and, to his surprise, himself to the little ring of cartoons. “Yasha and Molly are just friends, I think. You’re basically Nott’s guardian.” With each new relationship, she draws a uniquely styled line connecting the faces. From Molly’s character, she draws a variety of lines to almost everyone else. “I think Molly has pretty much slept with everyone at this point.”

“Not me!” Nott supplies.

“Or Beau,” Jester adds. “Look, Caleb, we get to add you in!” She connects Caleb’s drawing to Molly’s with a swirling line. Before he can once again bemoan his sex life being brought up, she adds another dotted line between himself and Fjord. He opens his mouth to question the addition, but Jester snaps the books shut and says, “And I _think_ that’s everything! Is that better?”

“Uh, ja…” He feels he needs a moment to digest the information and establish the various connections in his minds. Perhaps he’ll catch on more easily after seeing them all together a few more times.

“It can get a li’l confusin’ at times. Don’t worry about it too much. Helps if you just go along with it,” Fjord says, glancing over to Caleb with a smile. It soothes his worries somewhat.

“Look!” Jester’s shout startles both Caleb and Fjord. She hurls herself between the two men once again, pointing at Molly’s car further along the road and the other vehicle indicates to pull over. “See, he’s kicking Beau out!”

While Caleb tries to regain his steady breathing—his nerves are going to be ruined by the end of this trip—Fjord signals and pulls over just behind Molly. As they slow to a stop, Caleb sees that Molly and Yasha have already left the car. They’ve popped the hood open and now stand together, leaning over the car’s interior and discussing something between them.

“I don’t think Beau’s the problem,” Nott says.

“I’m gonna see if they need a hand.” Fjord leaves them with the car running and the air conditioning on.

“Caleb, do you think you could help?” Nott asks. “You read.”

Caleb huffs in amusement. “Ja, about magic and history, not cars.”

Jester manages to sit still for around half a minute before darting off to join the others. “I’m going to watch the boys bend over cars!” she shouts over her shoulder.

The remaining duo sit in a companionable silence, both watching the rest of their party gather around the car to discuss the issue at hand. Nott clears her throat in an obvious bid to draw Caleb’s attention to herself. Caleb looks over and raises an inquisitive brow.

“Yes?”

“How are you doing?”

The sincerity of the question takes him by surprise. “I am fine. The carsickness passed a while ago.”

“No, I mean in general. Are you having fun?”

“Yes, I am having fun.”

The look Nott levels him with aptly conveys just how much she doesn’t believe him. She unbuckles her seatbelt and scrambles forwards, squeezing through the gap between the front seats and crawling inelegantly into Fjord’s vacated space. She rights herself, only to turn back to the rear seats and fish around for something.

“What are you doing?” Caleb asks, watching the display with a mixture of amusement and wariness.

“Aha!” She pulls back, the bottle of nail polish clasped in one hand. “I thought you might want something to do while we wait.”

Caleb experiences a brief moment of confusion—Nott already has the colour smeared across her fingertips—before realising the polish is for him. Nott leaves him little room for argument, however; she’s already uncapped the bottle and taken one of his hands in her own before he realises what she’s doing. His nails are torn and jagged, and not exactly in the best condition. Nott is used to his nervous habit of biting and tearing at his nails so doesn’t question the state of them.

A knock at the window draws both of their gazes. Fjord grins from the other side of the passenger door. Nott turns back to her task while Caleb uses his free hand to open the door.

“Molly’s car’s a bit fucked—think it’s the battery. We’re gonna grab jumper cables from the back and hopefully get her started up again. We should be good to go soon.” If he’s surprised by their chosen activity to pass the time, Fjord doesn’t show it. He’s probably used to much weirder things taking place in this group, Caleb thinks.

Nott has finished one set of nails by the time Fjord and Jester return to set off again. Caleb relinquishes hit seat to Jester when Nott expresses just how much she wants to paint the other hand too. She’s not at all delicate or precise in her application, nor is the brash colour one Caleb is particularly fond of, but he gives into her wishes and soon finds himself with a set of bright pink nails, matching both Nott and Jester.

“Now we just need to do yours, Fjord,” Nott says.

“Can’t, I’m driving,” is the only reply the girls get. Caleb envies him for that excuse.

After a general consensus that it would be best to stop before dusk and set up camp nearby rather than pressing on into the night to reach the nearest large town, Yasha calls from the car ahead of them to inform Fjord of their intended route. She inexplicably knows a variety of good camping sites along their trail and can recall their exact location despite not being able to, or wanting to, explain how and when she’d last been there.

Fjord follows Molly down a beaten, dirt track. They pass a lonely farm and a field of wandering sheep, edging slowly closer and closer to the nearby woods. Molly flashes his lights and pulls over to stop. Fjord follows and pulls up alongside him.

Molly has joined them by the time they all step out, waiting by the trunk for Fjord to open it so he can help unload.

“I’ve had _enough_ of the sexual tension in that car,” he hisses. Fjord snorts loudly. “Do you know how painful it is watching two people who can’t flirt try to seduce each other? It’s awful. I need therapy.”

“Aww, Molly, you were _very_ brave for sitting through it,” Jester coos. “I’m gonna see if I can get them to kiss.” She zips off before anyone can reply or stop her. Fjord stares after her with a soft smile while Molly mutters ‘good luck’ under his breath.

After a moment, Fjord claps his hands together loudly, starling them all. “Molly, you good with getting the tents set up?”

Molly shrugs. “My whole apartment’s from Ikea. I’m sure I can manage a couple of tents.”

“Great. Nott, you wanna see what food you can rustle up? Me ‘n Caleb can go get some firewood so we can get a fire goin’ before it gets dark.”

Caleb feels he should warn Fjord against putting Nott in charge of their evening meal—she leans more towards experimental culinary arts rather than anything especially edible—but Fjord claps a hand to his shoulder before he can object. Caleb stumbles along for a step or two before falling into stride beside the other.

“It’s been pretty dry lately. Shouldn’t be too hard to find some decent wood.”

Caleb nods in agreement, although he really has no idea what qualifies as ‘decent wood’. He’s sure it would come as no real surprise to the others that he’s not exactly the outdoorsy type; adventuring is not his style. He much prefers caution and stability.

“Mind if I ask you a question?” Fjord says as they reach the outskirts of the woods. He waits for an answering nod from the wizard before continuing, “How’d you come to be in Nott’s company? I don’t think she’s ever really explained it but she’s awfully fond of you.”

“And I of her,” Caleb agrees. They continue on for a moment more as he tries to organise the story in his mind. “She tried to steal from me years ago. I was still an undergraduate. I don’t know why she tried; all I had in my wallet was a full stamp card for a free coffee from the café on campus.”

“She take it?”

Caleb gives a quiet laugh at the memory. “Of course. I went with her and got her a pastry to go with it. She was so small and skinny.” Fjord hands him a few broken branches as they delve a little deeper into the woods. Caleb bears the weight easily, focusing on the memories flitting about his mind rather than the task at hand. “I felt bad for her. She was only about twelve or so. We got talking about school and I said I could help with her homework and we met a few more times. I don’t know if she ran away from home or if her family just never noticed her missing but she’d stay with me most nights and I just somehow ended up with a little sister.”

His tale comes to a close, missing a few scenes and various details, but full enough of relevant material to convey his meaning. He realises they’ve stopped walking and that Fjord is staring at him. Caleb averts his gaze as he meets the other’s eyes, shying away from the attention.

“Y’know, I believe that’s’ the most I’ve ever heard you talk,” Fjord says. Caleb only shrugs. “Nott’s lucky to have you lookin’ out for her.”

Quietly, Caleb replies, “I’m the lucky one.” He doesn’t think Fjord heard until he catches the warm smile the Orc gives him.

“Nott talks about you like you hung the damn moon and stars yourself. Think I’m startin’ to see why.”

Caleb cannot even begin to decipher the meaning to his words, and isn’t sure he wants to, so instead he settles for a nonchalant shrug. Fjord only laughs and jostles his shoulder. He hands him another few pieces of wood, his own arms laden with the rest of their bounty.

“Come on, I think we’ve got enough to keep us goin’ for a while. Can’t leave that lot alone for too long or we’ll be heading back to the apocalypse.”


	5. Summary of ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief summary of what was to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hello my dudes, it's been a while.
> 
> I'll be honest, I doubt I'll ever properly finish this fic. I lose motivation for extended projects very quickly. I started this when I was maybe 2 or 3 episodes into campaign 2 and it was all new and exciting, but now I've been caught up for a while and prefer different character dynamics. 
> 
> About 8 months ago I wrote up a plan for the future chapters since this was a very spur of the moment fic with no plan beyond "road trip!". I hoped having everything planned out would make it easier to write but ngl I just don't want to. I'm going to call it quits now but I thought it would be nice to at least share the draft with you. Some of it is very brief, other bits are more detailed. Some bits may seem rushed or like they come out of nowhere - obviously it was meant to be more padded out than this!
> 
> Please excuse any errors; this was only meant to be seen by me!

 

  * When they get back, Yasha has taken over setting up the tents while Jester is lounging on the hood of Molly’s car reading the instructions to her and pretending to help. She jumps up when Caleb and Fjord get closer, excited to tell them something. Beau can’t move because she’s holding the tent poles in place while Yasha hammers the pegs into the ground but calls over to say they found something call. Jester runs over and holds onto Fjord’s arm and tells him that they went wandering through the trees and there’s a cool mineshaft just a couple of minutes away and that they should totally go exploring, maybe even ghost hunting if it’s haunted, which it probably is since it looks very haunted. Nott says they should bring a Ouija board or something and Molly says he’s not fucking with any ghost. Beau says she though he would fuck anything and Molly tells her to fuck off.



 

  * Jester really wants to go ghost hunting that evening but Fjord and Yasha say it would be a stupid idea. Nott is on Jester’s side but Caleb says that if anything goes wrong, it would be easier to deal with during the daytime. Nott asks what could go wrong and Caleb says it’s an abandoned mine, it’s probably falling apart and pitch black so Nott says yeah, so what does it matter if they go in the day or night? Molly suggests that they just have a chill evening, crack open a few drinks, have a laugh. Beau says she hates to agree but that sounds cool. Molly hands her a beer in reply.



 

  * Caleb finds himself a bit buzzed a few beers in, not drunk but loose with inebriation. Jester had handed their asses to them at cards and Beau whispers loudly to Caleb that Fjord and Molly probably let her win. Jester gets bored of winning everyone’s money and makes them play never have I ever. She looks at Caleb and says never have I ever been a doctor and Caleb rolls his eyes and drinks. Molly continues and says never have I ever been human. Beau and Caleb drink. Nott says never have I ever been ginger, and Caleb calls them out on targeting him. Beau says it’s pretty much tradition to get the newbie smashed. Fjord takes pity on him and says never have I ever blacked out from drinking and Molly grumbles “yeah you’re a real saint”. They go around a few times, during which Jester and Beau discover about Frumpkin and demand to see photos and Caleb does one better and just summons the cat. He sends Frumpkin to sit with the girls since Fjord gets a bit sneezy. Beau eventually says never have I ever slept with Molly, which sparks a debate as to whether or not Molly should drink to that himself. Caleb doesn’t miss the fact that Fjord drank. Fjord shrugs and says they’re all young and dumb once.



 

  * Eventually they end up with Molly telling spooky stories since Jester and Nott were sad about not ghost hunting. Nott is leaning against Caleb who’s playing with her hair. Jester is perched next to Molly, listening to his every word. Fjord is paying more attention to Jester, watching her fondly. Eventually Caleb falls asleep against Fjord’s shoulder and wakes up when Fjord tries to pick him up later. Fjord apologises, he hadn’t meant to wake him, but everyone’s turning in for the night. Caleb looks confused for a moment and catches on. He stands and stretches, catching Fjord’s eye. Fjord turns away to go say goodnight to the girls. Nott is walking over to the girl’s tent saying ‘no funny business, I mean it. I will make you all sleep outside’. Molly chuckles and points out how redundant it is to have separate gender tents when they’re all pretty queer. He pats Caleb’s shoulder and tells him to come on, if he keeps looking cute and sleepy Molly will let him sleep in the middle where it’s warmest.



 

  * The next morning Jester gets them all up early and Nott is already cooking breakfast, saying they need their strength if they’re going to hunt ghosts. Everyone’s a little hungover, except Jester. Jester leads the way into the mine and Fjord stays close to her. Nott and Caleb trail at the back behind the others. Fjord is careful to make sure no one trips over anything. They’ve only got the one torch and Caleb can’t see very well. Nott holds his hand when they get deeper into the mine so he knows where they’re going. Caleb pauses and Nott tugs on him. He says he hears something. Everyone stops. They also hear it. There’s a steady, flapping sound. Out of nowhere, a bird flies at them. They scream, then laugh. It’s just a bird. They step forward to keep moving and Shakaste turns up out of nowhere and says well hello there, they scream again. He’s working on a reservation project to maintain the mine, just doing a quick sweep before the rest of his team come. He advises that they leave soon, he wouldn’t want them getting hurt. He escorts them out. Everyone likes him but Caleb doesn’t trust him. He asks if anyone thinks he seems weird and they say no. They hear a howl from within the mines after Shakaste goes back in. They all look at each other as another howl sounds. Molly breaks the silence and suggests they leave.



 

  * Drive to Zadash, Caleb takes up residence in Molly’s car. Nott and Caleb sit in the back, Yasha’s got headphones in and Nott’s asleep. Molly’s asking Caleb how his thesis is going. Caleb says it’s... going. Molly asks if he’s been to Zadash, thinks he said he hadn’t, and Caleb confirms. Says he wouldn’t mind sneaking away from the group to look at the library; he hasn’t had the chance to check but he thinks there might be a few books of interest there. Molly says if there is and he needs to come back for an academic visit, they could all make another field trip of it. Caleb says he thinks they would get him all fired and Molly laughs.



 

  * When Fjord parks up at a hostel Beau picked, he’s blushing. Jester’s lipstick is smudged and Beau looks very proud of herself. Molly snickers and says he didn’t take Fjord for a prude. Fjord says he’s not, it’s just that the girls are very distracting. Nott says they’re all gross, she’s getting a room on her own.



 

  * Jester, Yasha and Fjord take all their stuff up to the rooms, Molly asks around to see if anything’s going on in the city.



 

  * Caleb and Beau – library



 

  * Others go shopping, meet up for lunch.



 

  * Jester says they’re setting up for a big festival and there’s fancy parties going on everywhere and that they should all go out and wear masks and look pretty. Yasha looks uncomfortable and Caleb asks if she’s staying in again. Molly says she should come, he’ll look after her. Yasha says she’ll go if Caleb goes. Caleb agrees when Molly makes a pleading face. Molly tells the others the introverts are coming, Jester cheers and Fjord grins.



 

  * Masquerade street party: Jester braids Caleb’s hair and Beau puts some eyeliner on him. He says he doesn’t really trust her near his eyes and why does he need makeup if they’re wearing masks. Beau tells him to shut up.



 

  * They go out, eat street food, try some local wine. Jester tries to talk them into getting into fancy elite parties and fails. Some of them dance and drink more. Eventually they make their way back to the hostel and pick up some more wine to drink in the room.



 

  * Next day they laze about and then head out. Jester’s excited for the carnival. There are games and prizes and more street food. Nott has Caleb pretend to be her father so they can swindle the archery guy out of more prizes when he feels bad for her.



 

  * They head further towards the centre and someone’s advertising a gaming tournament. Jester squeals and says they should sign up. Caleb says he’s not very good at fighting games and Jester says neither is she, she just mashes all the buttons and it turns out okay.



 

  * They enter the tournament. Each round every team faces an enemy, the team who takes the longest is knocked out. For the final round, the teams face each other. Caleb takes out people aiming for Beau and she takes a knife for him. She says she still thinks he’s kinda weird but that was cool of him. Fjord organises them all into a plan and a formation since they fight like a bunch of lunatics. Molly and Jester distract, Caleb and Nott pick off strays and snipers from a distance. They win, barely. They get a voucher for a free meal for the team at a local pub. Molly says he knows what they can do for the evening.



 

  * Yasha and Beau go to get them another round of drinks. They’re chatting at the bar and Molly says oh my god Yasha’s smiling at Beau. Nott asks if that’s weird, and Molly says that Yasha hasn’t really been into Beau until lately. Caleb asks if this is a thing that’s been going on for a while and Molly says Beau’s been trying to get into her pants since the day they met. Jester says you can’t blame her, Yasha looks like a goddess, the kind that kills people probably. Caleb awkwardly asks if it’s not weird seeing her girlfriend flirt with someone else and Jester shrugs and says if I want more attention, I ask for it. Besides, she has Fjord too so it would be unfair to get all grumpy about it. Molly says that Fjord will probably have someone else soon too and Jester laughs and Fjord cuts in to change the subject.



 

  * The next morning they’re looking at what to do. Fjord asks if there’s any points of interest and Beau says there’s the big library, the towers, the Pentamarket. They’ve loosely covered everything; it’s not really a tourist town. Jester says they could go out partying again, and Beau says you’d want to go to Hupperdook for that, that’s the party town. Jester gasps and asks if it’s nearby. Beau shrugs, says it’s probably not somewhere you’d go for a day trip from here. Caleb looks it up on his phone. He’s sat with them in their room (dragged in when Jester saw him leaving the bathroom) because they want to play with Frumpkin. He says it’s maybe a three- or four-hour drive. Jester says they can ask the others and see what they think.



 

  * The others are down for a change of scenery. It feels almost strange to stay in one place for too long. They change their plans and leave Zadash a couple of days early.



 

  * Get to Hupperdook and check in. Hang around for an afternoon, Caleb naps with Nott. Fjord wakes him up when they go for food.



 

  * Party starts fairly suddenly. They’re on a street with a lot of bars, obviously staying in a party hostel. Molly buys them all shots. Jester just has the one because she doesn’t drink much. Caleb thinks he sees her sneak off with Molly and Beau to take something. They come back with wide eyes and bright grins. Fjord tells them all to say safe. He grabs the next round and ignores the others laughing at him as the bartender very obviously hits on him. Jester tells him he stammered so much he sounds like Caleb. Fjord just says she was being very crass and Beau says yeah yeah, you’re a real gentleman.



 

  * Caleb feels pretty awkward with the partying; Jester pulls Nott off to dance and Fjord gets another round for himself, Molly, and Caleb. Caleb looks around for Beau and Yasha but Molly says he probably doesn’t want to go looking for them. Fjord’s talking to the bartender again and Molly says he’d usually offer a repeat of the last time he got Caleb drunk but he feels like Caleb should maybe cast a line somewhere else. Caleb is very confused. Molly looks very pointedly at Fjord. Caleb is _more_ confused. Molly rolls his eyes and says stop him if he’s wrong but Fjord’s been giving Caleb eyes since they met and he’s obviously interested, and Caleb could do a lot worse than a vet with an ass like that. Caleb blushes. Molly winks and tells him to consider it and slinks off. Caleb downs the remainder of his drink.



 

  * Fjord seems surprised that they’ve been left alone. Caleb flaps a hand and says Molly went to do his… thing. Fjord laughs and says that’s not unusual. They stand kind of awkwardly together for a moment. Fjord clears his throat and asks if Caleb’s had his eye on anyone tonight. Caleb doesn’t reply for a bit and then says maybe. He looks to Fjord and Fjord’s smirking a bit. He turns to look at Caleb with an intense look. Caleb just blurts out that he’s terrible at flirting. Fjord laughs. He says he wasn’t meaning to be so direct but he can skip the flirting if he wants. Caleb orders another drink and downs it surprisingly quickly. Fjord says he won’t press the issue if Caleb’s uncomfortable, especially not if he’s getting drunk, and Caleb says of course he’s uncomfortable, look at Fjord. Fjord looks hurt for a moment and Caleb clarifies that Fjord’s one of the most attractive men he’s ever seen, he’s out of his depth here. Fjord smiles and says he happens to have a thing for redheads with accents. Caleb just says oh. Fjord asks if he can kiss him and Caleb says yes. When they pull apart Fjord asks if he wants to dance. Caleb says he doesn’t really dance. Fjord smirks and asks if he wants to go horizontal tango and Caleb can’t believe how awful that line is, he might have to reconsider his options. He takes Fjord’s hand and pulls him upstairs, though. The liquor has made him brave and he wants to kiss Fjord again without a pounding beat in his ears and a crowd around them.



 

  * They make it as far as Nott and Caleb’s room. Caleb remembers to text Nott to tell her to knock very loudly or stay in another room before Fjord pulls the phone from him. He pins Caleb to the bed and kisses him thoroughly, then makes a deliberate, calculated trail of kisses down his neck and chest, unbuttoning his shirt as he goes. His hand keeps a gentle pressure on Caleb’s crotch. He says to tell him if anything’s not okay and he’ll stop. Caleb says he’ll hex him if he stops. Fjord just grins and gets to work.



 

  * Caleb wakes up the next day too warm with a hangover. Fjord’s drooled on his shoulder. He sits up; his back aches and he has a pounding headache. His mouth tastes like he feasted on dirt and topped it off by gargling gravel. There’s water on the bedside table and Nott’s in her twin bed across the room. He downs the water and manages to stand up. He goes to the bathroom and decides to shower. In the shower he thinks about the night before. He’s going to need to tell Fjord that this isn’t a regular thing, that he doesn’t do sleeping around or dating. He’s too busy, he tells himself. He knows it’s because he’s not comfortable in his own skin, in his own mind, not enough to let someone else in. It wouldn’t be fair to Fjord to get his hopes up. He’ll let him down easy early on before he gets too invested and finds out that Caleb’s not worth it, not when he has someone as bright and outgoing as Jester already.



 

  * Fjord’s not awake when he gets back. He dresses and goes to get breakfast. Yasha, Molly and Jester are downstairs already. Molly looks a little worse for wear but Yasha and Jester look well rested. Caleb knows he looks like shit and tells Jester as much when she points it out. He gets a couple of pastries and a bowl of cereal. Jester watches him with a wicked grin. She asks how Fjord is and Caleb says he’s fine. Jester asks if he had fun last night and Caleb says he doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Molly taps at the side of his neck. Caleb’s hand touches the same spot on his own neck. It’s tender. Jester says yeah, he’s got a huuuuge love bite there. He should watch out for that; Fjord likes to do that. Caleb blushes and stays quiet throughout breakfast.



 

  * Things are very awkward with Fjord, Caleb doesn’t get a chance to talk to him alone before they start packing to leave.



 

  * Fjord picks up on some tension and says he’s gonna go fill up the truck before they decide what to do, says he can pick up some supplies to, asks Caleb to come with him. Jester wolf whistles. On the walk to the car, Fjord says he doesn’t actually have to come with him, he just wanted to talk. Caleb says it was fun but he was drunk and didn’t know what he was doing. Doesn’t want Fjord to get the wrong idea. Fjord looks hurt but then smiles and says no worries, he gets it, thanks for telling him. Fjord goes to the store alone.



 

  * Caleb makes sure to ride with Molly for the rest of the trip. They head back to Zadash to see festival's closing firework show. No one brings it up with Caleb again. He assumes Fjord told Jester what happened because she keeps giving him dirty looks. Nott tells him when they book into the same hostel that day that it’s a shame it didn’t work out, he looked happy when he was hanging out with Fjord. Caleb says he doesn’t recall hanging out with Fjord all that much and Nott shrugs, she things Fjord went out of his way more than Caleb realises. It makes Caleb feel guilty because he didn’t notice.



 

  * They head out of the city a bit where it’s more nature-y to sit on a hill and watch the display. Caleb finds himself watching Fjord and having to make himself look away. He knows its stupid because he already turned him down. He’s the kind of man Caleb would want to be but knows he never could. He’s considerate, charismatic, a natural leader. Words come to him easily and he’s never afraid to have attention on him. Caleb, he thinks, doesn’t even deserve to be alive. He doesn’t deserve attention from someone like that. Tears prick at his eyes. Nott holds his hand but doesn’t mention it.



 

  * They get ready for a drive back. Going to camp along the way at a nice site Yasha knows. Caleb’s realises this means sharing a tent with Fjord again.



 

  * They set up a campfire and play silly drinking games, reminding them of their other night spent in a field. This time there are no ghost stories or strange men or howling. Beau sits on the ground in front of Yasha, nestled between her legs. Jester sits between Fjord and Molly, Fjord laughing loudly as they do impressions of Beau trying to flirt with Yasha. Caleb thinks he was silly for thinking he could fit in with them. They seem so jovial, so well melded together. They’re nice enough to let him in, to let him watch and feel like a part of something, but he knows he isn’t really a member for their ragtag team. He turns in early and pretends to be asleep when the others come to bed.



 

  * Nott grabs him the next morning and says he needs to talk to her. He’s been living in his head ever since he slept with Fjord. She says if Fjord did anything, she’ll go kill him right now, and Caleb says it’s not Fjord that's the problem. He’s just exhausted from being around people and wants to go back to work. Nott says he’s lying. Caleb sighs and says not really. He’s not like these people, he’s not carefree, he’s fucked up. Nott says so what, everyone’s fucked up in their own way. Caleb says yes but not like him and Nott is confused. Caleb says she wouldn’t understand and she says tell her. Fjord comes over while everyone else is packing up, concerned that they’re shouting and arguing. Nott points at him and says whatever he did to Caleb, he’ll pay for it. Fjord holds his hands up in surrender and says he was just coming over to tell them they're packing up. Caleb scowls and says no one did anything to him. (Not recently, anyway). He’s fucked up (and a murderer, he wants to say) so if everyone could just leave him alone that would be great. He just wants everyone to stop treating him like he's made of glass and leave him alone. Nott looks like she wants to say something; she knows what happened in his youth and this is a conversation they've had many times, but she doesn't want to say anything in front of Fjord. Fjord says maybe they should all go sit down and calm down and Caleb says he is calm, it’s everyone else that keeps prodding and prying and riling him up when he wants nothing to do with them and just wants to go home. Fjord tenses and says okay and walks away. Nott sighs and asks if he wants to ride with Molly today. Caleb quietly says yes. He has a feeling he fucked things up and knows it’s what he wanted but doesn’t understand why he’s upset about it.



 

  * Back at work – Caleb got friend requests from pretty much everyone else in the group except Fjord and is added to the group chat. He has it on mute but replies when someone asks him something directly. Fjord seems to have not mentioned what Caleb said and acts friendly to him in the chat.



 

  * There’s a commotion within the office and a familiar voice pipes up. Jester stomps over to his desk and complains that his office is really hard to find and she thought he’d have his own office, not one shared with other people. Caleb stammers and asks what she’s doing here.



 

  * Jester gives Caleb a dressing down. Fjord told her what happened. Beau wanted to come here but if she did Caleb would be dead. Caleb feels like he might die anyway, Jester can be much scarier than Beau. Jester says he was really shitty in what he did and said. He can’t assume no one else doesn’t have problems and that only his matter. It doesn’t matter how big they feel to him, it’s not an excuse to be an asshole. If he wants to be an asshole because of trauma, go to therapy, she has the number for a good therapist if he wants it by the way. She says that everyone really liked him even though he was weird and stinky at times and that the reason he has no friends is because he’s scared of having them and doesn’t like people getting to know him so he’s an asshole to keep himself safe, which she understands but it’s bullshit. Caleb is quiet throughout all this. He knows everything she’s saying is true.



 

  * Jester eventually stops and then invites him to movie night and Caleb says he’s very confused because he thought she was mad at him. She says he is but she assumes he’s going to apologise to Fjord for being mean to him and that she figured she might as well invite him now while she remembers. If he’s not stopped being stupid by then he can’t come though. Caleb sighs and asks where Fjord works.



 

  * Tide's Breath - bar Fjord works at – Caleb goes in and asks for a whisky on ice. Fjord says he doesn’t like whisky and Caleb says a friend of his does, figures he’d try it. Fjord asks if he’s a friend now and Caleb says he would like to be. Fjord says he’s not gonna mince his words, he put himself out there for Caleb and got played around like a cat with a toy. Caleb says he knows and he’s sorry. He says he has things he needs to work through, behaviours he needs to change. He says he’s not good to be around, he’s not optimistic, he barely a realist. He has night terrors and panic attacks. He’s not confident or brave. He’s nothing like the others, nothing like Fjord.



 

  * Fjord takes it all in and says he’s pretty brave for coming here and saying that. Caleb says he’s shitting himself. Fjord laughs a little. He says he’s hurt and not happy with him. He understands why Caleb did it, maybe not the full context but enough to get the gist. Maybe one day he’d like to understand completely. But if he’s willing to give it another go, so is Fjord. He knows Caleb has his rough edges, so does he. He’s not always so charming and handsome. Caleb laughs. Fjord says relationships aren’t all sunshine and roses, sometimes it’s ugly, sometimes it’s hard, but it’s something you work with and work through. Caleb says he told him before, he’s not good with all this. Fjord says he can start by putting a little trust in him and they can see where they go from there. Caleb says maybe they could see if they go to dinner next weekend, and Fjord says that sounds mighty nice to him.



 

  * Epilogue: Caleb wakes up too hot, Fjord drooling on his shoulder. An arm is slung over his waist and his legs are tangled with Fjord’s. The man is like a space heater; Caleb needs to remember to open the window when Fjord stays over. There’s a banging at the door, Jester calling for them to stop fucking, she’s coming in. Caleb sits up in bed and peers at her as she blurs through the doorway and is by the bedside. She’s jostling Fjord to wake him up. She tells Caleb to get dressed and wake Fjord up, they need to get going. She leaves when Nott calls for her from another room. Caleb hears a crash and decides he doesn’t want to know what happened. Fjord’s already woken up in the commotion. He kisses Caleb softly. He’s awake and mobile faster than Caleb, who’s still bleary eyed and tempted to go back to sleep. Fjord pulls clothes from his drawer in Caleb’s dresser. When he’s dressed, he crawls back onto the bed and leans over Caleb, kissing his neck. Caleb smiles and sighs. He could get used to this. Fjord sneezes suddenly, all over Caleb, and Caleb scrunches up his nose. Frumpkin jumps on the bed and Caleb groans at his cockblocking cat. Jester shouts for them and Fjord says he’ll be out in a sec. He leaves Caleb to get up and finish packing for their annual road trip. He adds his bag to Fjords and Nott’s by the door and goes to get some breakfast, working on autopilot. Fjord gives him a plate of eggs and toast while Nott finishes fiddling with the coffee machine. Jester’s babbling about how excited she is to go see her mama again and says Fjord can show her all the places he was stationed at. Nott nudges Caleb and asks how he is. Caleb smiles and says he’s good.



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND THERE WE GO
> 
> Thanks for reading my dudes.
> 
> If anyone wants to take any elements of this and, y'know, not abandon it halfway, please do so and let me know - I'd love to see it :)


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